Grief Gives Way to Frustration!

So, let me be honest, I have been CRABBY lately! I feel like everyone is against me, well, computers at least! It seems like when it's time for me to actually do something, or I get motivated enough to do something, the computer just gives up on me, then I get frustrated. This was happening over the course of a couple weeks--I was feeling crabby and frustrated more and more often. I didn't think much about it...then I realized it, GRIEF!

I know it sounds weird, but I really think that this whole grief thing does more than make you sad. I have been having feelings of frustration and anger that I don't usually feel. I'm sure that if I had read up on this whole grief thing there would have been a blurb somewhere about how anger is part of the process, but hey, isn't it more fun to figure it out on your own : ) Okay, maybe not, but I have been thankful that God has shown me where these feelings were and are coming from. I have just been asking Him for help and guidance down this long road.

It's a weird thing, I don't want to break down and cry all the time, but when the urge comes, I want to "obey" that feeling; at the same time, I know that I can't let these feelings rule my life. There is also that sense of not wanting to not cry, if that makes sense, because I don't want to feel like I have forgotten about her. I understand logically that just because I don't cry all the time that it doesn't mean I don't miss her, but in my heart, it's a different feeling.

Time keeps passing by, life keeps happening. May this grief give way to something good...in its own time.